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In Honor of Halloween!
Hollywood’s  “Haunted Rides”


by Corey Conley















October is here, and thoughts are turning from summer’s delights to falling leaves, artificial pumpkin flavor, and naughty nurse costumes. Halloween is on its way, and in celebration of everyone’s favorite sugar-coma inducing holiday, Dish pulled together this list of our favorite Hollywood “sweet” rides... that also happen to be haunted.

1. Christine (Christine 1983)
John Carpenter’s classic adaptation of Stephen King’s novel Christine features a 1957 Plymouth Fury with some jealousy issues. Everyone’s been in a bad relationship, but few people can say their 3,600 lb. girlfriend held a grudge like Christine. Not only did she take revenge on a gang of young toughs who dinged her up, she also went after her owner’s girlfriend when he tried to date within the species. In the end, poor Arnie was accidentally killed while on a ride-along for one of her killing sprees.
Christine (Christine 1983)
Year: 1957
Make:
Plymouth
Model: Fury
Body Count: 8
Best feature: Christine can heal herself from any damage, saving thousands on maintenance.


2. Dodge M4S Turbo Interceptor (The Wraith 1986)
Haunted cars and gangs of thugs just don’t get along. This particular posse races fast cars and keeps a small town living in fear. Their leader, Packard, even killed local nice guy Jamie and the police are powerless. Enter the Wraith. This mysterious, black clad driver starts turning gang members into greasy fireballs. It’s classic 80’s revenge thriller with a pre-crazy Charlie Sheen and a small-town Sheriff played by Randy Quaid, which should be included in every 80s movie. The car was only a concept and never sold to the public, but styling from the 500 horsepower beast made its way into the Dodge Stealth sports car.
Dodge M4S Turbo Interceptor (The Wraith 1986)
Year: 1984
Make: Dodge
Model: M4S Turbo Interceptor
Body Count: 5
Best Feature: Keys. It’s one thing to have a sleek, revenge-seeking supercar from the underworld that can re-materialize in perfect condition after a fiery accident, it’s quite another to have one you can hand your little brother, as Sheen’s character does at the end of this movie.


3. 1971 Lincoln Continental Mark III (The Car 1977)
“Is it a phantom, a demon, or the devil himself?” reads the movie poster for The Car, about a homicidal Lincoln killing off people in the fictional Utah town of Santa Ynez. That’s just one of many unanswered questions in the movie. The evil Continental is spooked by graveyards but otherwise has little compunction about stalking and running over schoolchildren, cyclists, and the town sheriff. Its origins and motives are never explained, but perhaps it’s angry over the reviews. The late, great movie critic Gene Siskel titled his review “The Cinematic Turkey of 1977.”

1971 Lincoln Continental Mark III (The Car 1977)Year Made: 1971
Make: Lincoln
Model: Continental
Body Count: 10
Best Feature: A celebrity endorsement. Forget Eddie Bauer Ford Explorers, the opening credits quote the Church of Satan’s leader at the time, Anton LaVey. "Oh great brothers of the night who rideth upon the hot winds of hell, who dwelleth in the Devil's lair; move and appear."


4. Super Hybrid (Super Hybrid 2011)
While the era of bell bottoms and big hair has its share of evil car movies of questionable artistic merit, 2011’s Super Hybrid is proof the genre keeps on truckin’. Although it starts as an old, black Chevy Nova, the movie’s automotive antagonist changes into different cars to seduce, stalk, and kill the unlucky humans trapped in an underground police impound lot. Although the movie trailer proudly points out the echoes of Christine, this straight-to-dvd stinker is one for the bargain bin, not cinematic history.


Super Hybrid (Super Hybrid 2011)Year: Unknown
Make: Chevy
Model: Nova
Body Count: 8
Best Feature: Shape shifting. Tired of your ride? The Super Hybrid’s ability to change into whatever ride it likes is a sure cure for boredom. Of course, so are its homicidal tendencies.


5. Herbie (The Love Bug 1968)
Sure, The Love Bug is a heartwarming tale from Disney’s golden era, not a gruesome thriller of vehicular mayhem, but the 1963 Volkswagen Racing Beetle headlining this beloved classic definitely qualifies as “haunted.” Herbie sprays oil on his enemies, gets drunk on Irish coffee, and helps his driver with the ladies. He’s the one love bug you don’t have to test for.

Herbie (The Love Bug 1968)Year: 1963
Make: Volkswagen
Model: Beetle
Body Count: 0 (unless you count the childhoods that died during Lindsey Lohan’s Herbie: Fully Loaded)
Best Feature: Men have always used cars to impress that special gal, but how many can say their ride is their wingman?


6. Little Bastard (Real life, 1955)
In a twist worthy of M. Night Shyamalan, this last car actually existed. ‘Little Bastard’ was the Porsche 550 Spyder James Dean drove to his death. Legends abound about this supposedly ‘cursed’ car. Sir Alec Guinness (Obi-Wan Kenobi in the original Star Wars films) said he told Dean the car looked “sinister,” and that if he drove that car he would be dead “by this time next week.” In seven days, Dean was dead.

Little Bastard wasn’t done yet. The next owner sold the car after it fell off a trailer and broke a mechanic’s leg. Parts of the car ended up in two different cars. In a race between the two cars one driver died when he lost control and hit a tree, while the other was seriously injured after a mechanical problem caused a rollover. For what was left of the original car, the legend outlines a string of tire blowouts, unlucky thieves, a burned down museum, an injured high school student, and the three times it fell off a transport truck in a single attempt to move it, causing one death.

Little Bastard (Real life, 1955)Year: 1955
Make: Porsche
Model: 550 Spyder
Body count: ?
Best Feature: It’s gone. No one knows what happened to the Little Bastard, which mysteriously disappeared while being transported by its owner.



www.Dishmag.com / Issue 196 - October 2017
Turnpage Blk


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